"A"

I have been hesitant to write on here as of late, because I don't know what or how much I am allowed to say.  As I mentioned last time, we are adopting through the county/state.  I haven't really been briefed on confidentiality, but common sense tells me I shouldn't put a kid who's not mine (yet) on blast all over the interweb.  For privacy purposes on this blog I suppose I should call him "A".  I also have photos, videos, information about his history etc... but should also probably keep private at this time.  Later on when everything is final I am sure that I will be posting more photographs of little A than you even care to see . .

So yeah, we met him a few weeks ago.  I tell you I wasn't a believer in love at first sight until I had kids.  I felt that way with Levi and with A also.  He is such a sweetie.  He takes everything in slowly and thoughtfully.  He has dimples you just want to kiss and big, brown puppy dog eyes that are probably going to work to his advantage with me and letting him get away with stuff more than I should.  He just turned two, and is at the age where he enjoys peek-a-boo and pressing any type of buttons he can find.  He likes hearing different sounds, noises and volumes as well.  He loves kids and currently has been living with some foster brother and sisters around Levi's age.

He is with two foster moms now, and they have just been great.  They have provided a loving home for him and worked hard these past six months to help A grow and blossom.  I really admire how well behaved their children are and how well they have taken care of A.  Both of his foster moms have made this transition super easy on us, and have really guided us along.  I know his likes, dislikes, his insecurities and routines already because they have really spent a lot of time filling us in.

When A first arrived at their house all he had with him were the clothes on his back and a bag of flaming hot cheetos that he was eating.  Stop and think about that for a moment.  He was one years old - eating flaming hot cheetos.  I can barely handle the heat of those things sometimes.  Wow, it kind of gives me a glimpse of how hard his life must have been at one point.  In fact I know his life has been hard.... but like I said before I am holding back on the details.

The social worker is planning on doing an 'emergency placement' and even though we are not licensed yet the goal is to have him permanently in our house by the thirteenth.  Exactly a month to the day she first called about him.  The adoption social worker says this "feels like a miracle."  Her words.  Not mine.  The foster care social worker says she is blown away at how quickly this is happening for us.  (And she deals with every single family who does foster care)

What is it with extraordinary things happening in my life?  I really don't get it.  Why do miracles, awesome people, and awesome circumstances just fall into my lap?  Beats me.  I am a lucky girl.

Well there is a ton more to write about... but I'll have to do that later . . .

ONE YEAR!

One whole year and I'm still here. Ha HA take THAT diablo! Yeeeeeeee!

Yesterday was my one year anniversary of my double lung transplant!  I know, I didn't write anything, I am a bad blogger.  Not to say I wasn't thankful, I am, I was just so busy...

THIS YEAR HAS BEEN CRAZY AWESOME!!  It definitely goes down in the books as one of the best years of my life, and that is saying a lot because I have had some pretty great years.  It is weird to think it has only been a year in a sense because it seems like a distant lifetime ago that I was sick.

They say it takes a village to raise a child.  Literally though it really does take close to a village to give someone a lung transplant.  From my great CF doctor, the CF team, the surgeon, the transplant coordinator, the anesthesiologist, the nurses, respiratory therapists, physical therapists the transplant doctors and I'm sure a bunch of other very important people that are slipping my mind at the moment.  It really restored my view of the human race as a whole, and made me realize that there is some good left in this crazy world of ours.
I am eternally grateful.

Yesterday my dad brought up to remember the donor's family and that a year ago they lost a loved one.  It was a somber moment, remembering my donor.
I am eternally grateful.

We had a little celebration last night at our house.  I had so much fun.  Most of my good friends were there and I just had a blast.  I get by with a little help from my friends (Actually A LOT of help) and the close friends that I have are more important to me than ever before.  I'm a lucky girl with really great friends.
I am eternally grateful.

And . . . last but not least :  Abba Father God.  I am thankful for this life he has entrusted me with... I am unworthy of it, but am so glad he sustains me and lets me live.  Not only has he let me live, it has been a year of enjoyment and blessing, fun and partying.
I am eternally grateful.

- - - - - - 

In other news . . .  

Seth and I have decided to pursue adoption!  We are very excited about this.  We are slowly working our way to getting licensed through the county.

We both totally have a heart for adoption and it has been an idea we have thrown back and forth since we first got married almost ten years ago.  There are so many kids that need a loving and caring home.  We believe adoption is biblical and not only will the child benefit from it, we will too.  

Weeeeell, things were moving along slowly/normal ... we still have a ton of stuff to do before we are anywhere near being licensed.  But wanna hear something cool?  Yesterday on my one year lung anniversary I got a voicemail on my cell phone.  It was about the possible placement of a two year old little boy!  (Which is exactly the age range/gender we are hoping for)  She said she wanted to expedite the process.  I don't know how much I am allowed to say on here, but eeeeeeeeeeeee!  

We don't know for sure if this little guy will be ours yet or not, but we do get to meet him soon and he may even get to stay with us as early as January depending on how things go.  

I just wanted to let you know so you could be praying!  Like I said... nothing is for sure but it is a possibility that we could be adopting very, very soon.

I think God has fun blowing my mind.

Mike & Rachel

A couple of weeks ago we had our family from Ireland come for a visit.  Seth's sister, her husband and their boy.  We only get to see them once a year at best... and we are always thankful they make the trip to come and see us.

Mike (our brother-in-law) is the pastor of a Calvary Chapel in Cork.  He taught at our church while he was here.  It was pretty rad - here is the link if you want to check it out.

http://ccmv.org/

Me

Lately I feel like I am rediscovering who I am.  That sounds cheesy, but I don't know how else to put it.  I think we all do it from time to time without even realizing it.  A few days ago I was listening to some blues music that I used to listen to when I was a child.  I realized that I still liked it and have similar taste in music to my seven-year-old self.  I made mention of this to Seth and he said something along the lines of we are still the same person we once were we just build upon and add tastes.  Am I that same person I was as a child?  Where memories blend with dreams and everything is kind of clouded over?
I didn't think so.  Two years ago I would tell you how absolutely different I was from how I was when I was young.  All of the pressures and struggles - I was definitely an adult.
Hmmm.  If we stripped all that away and had the luxury of being carefree I think we are more like the past versions of our miniature selves than we realize.  I feel like I was one sort of person as a teenager and then the last couple of years, someone else.  This has been such a significant year, and now I am recognizing old characteristics that I thought were things of the past.  It's like going back in time except without erasing the future.

And I am starting to feel more like myself now than ever before.

Anna Banana

One of my CF friends, Anna Modlin is getting a double lung transplant this very minute!  She is in surgery at Stanford right now.  Please pray for her.  Please pray for a smooth surgery, smooth recovery and the donor's family.  Her is her blog where all updates will be posted:

http://annabananasvarietyshow.blogspot.com/

Hey, I remember you!

I don't know why I haven't been writing lately.  No good excuse.  There is a season for everything I guess, and lately this hasn't been what I've been up to.  Skipped clear over October!  There are things sitting on my brain and my heart - good things, bad things, things I am proud of, things I am not proud of.  Life.  Things I'm not sure if I want to share with the 'world'.  Thoughts I have a hard time making sense of in my own brain.  I don't want to cast pearls to swine either.  Wait.  Did I just call you a pig?!?!?  I believe I did.  Ha  - that is not what I meant though.
You know that.

Things are going great.  No, they really are - I'm not just saying that.  We have done tons of things since my last post including a quick three day hospitalization and several awesome vacations.  I did try to upload a video after one of our trips, but the stinking website was giving me heaps of trouble.  So I gave up.  Then I forgot.

Last night we went up to see a show at the Great American Music Hall (I like that venue).  Margot and the Nuclear So and So's.  We went with my sister and brother-in-law.  Fun.  Today has been tough for me to stay awake.  I'm beat.  It was worth it though.

Maybe I'll go and try to upload that video again ....

Happy day to you.

Art by: Levi

Kindergarten

This morning I sent Levi off to his first day of school ever. That's right, he started kindergarten! My baby is of course no longer a baby, but grown up into a full-fledged kid!

Yesterday we had his orientation where we got to meet his teacher, see his classroom etc.  When we arrived I headed toward the kindergarten buildings, because naturally, he is beginning kindergarten.  I couldn't find his room number, and was told it was in the main building.  When we found the proper classroom and I started talking with the parents and the teacher I found out that unbeknownst to me he was in a K/1st Grade class!  I guess based on the knowledge they have of him from our application, the school decided that this was the best class for him.  There are 13 kindergarteners and 10 first graders in his class.   He doesn't go to lunch with the rest of the kindergarteners at his school during the kindergarten lunchtime, but instead goes with the first and second graders.  He doesn't go to the kindergarten jungle gym or have his classes in the kindergarten building.

This concerned me for a second, but then I thought about how absolutely smart Levi is, and that he also does really well socially.  I don't like to just brag on here, but Levi is a very bright boy, and has known the whole alphabet since he was one year old, and learned to tell time on an analog clock when he was two.

This morning when we arrived he found his cubby and jumped right in, just as if he had always done it.  I knew he'd be fine and do great.  I knew that I was probably more nervous than he was.  I stayed for the welcoming assembly, and then kissed his cheek goodbye and went home to an empty, quiet house.  The whole thing was a little bit emotional, but I didn't get misty eyed until I saw this note on the counter:

When I picked Levi up he said that the day had been great and he had already made friends.





I hope this school is ready for Levi! He is one amazing kid!

The flea

This past weekend we were vendors at the flea market.

(* Sidenote:  Half of my life I have lived in Southern California and the other half Northern.  I am split on what to call it - swap meet or flea market.  It's this little personal identity crisis that I have)

We have slowly accumulated quite a pile of unwanted junk.  We finally got together with Rebecca and Kyle to rent a space and sell.  Ever since before I can remember I have gone to the swap meet, but have never sold there before.  It was fun!  Don't worry . . . I wasn't pacing back and forth yelling "ONE DOLLA, ONE DOLLA, EVERYTHING ONE DOLLA" but I could definitely see myself doing it again.

Dollar signs appeared in my sister and my eyeballs as we were trying to figure out how to buy things at thrift stores and try to resell it at a profit, haha.  Also, Rebecca and I moseyed around to shop of course - it's a talent we share.  I found a few little nuggets.

Distressed drawers: $5

And everyones NEEDS a copper ship wall art right?  Right.

In other news - earlier today I had that doctor's appointment in Palo Alto that I was talking about last time.  ↓

They said my sinuses look perfectly clear, and they saw nothing really wrong with them.
Come back in a year.

Ahhh.  music to my ears.

Rejection Free

Okay, some good news!  Last week I had another bronchoscopy. (3rd, 4th, 5th one?  Who knows.  I have lost track.)

There is no more rejection!  Praise God for His mercy!

They found some bacteria in my lungs and almost put me on antibiotics for it, but at the last second decided not to, which led to me doing a little happy jig.  They think it may be coming down from my sinuses (which are still CF sinuses)  so I need to schedule an ENT appointment.  Yep, I had better go do that . . .